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HomeArticlesHow I worked as a business aviation flight attendant

How I worked as a business aviation flight attendant

I felt like something between Cinderella and the workhorse
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Well...it's time to talk about how I worked as the Queen of heaven.)))

I'm not in vain called himself the Queen of heaven. Before you get on private planes, I have worked in Aeroflot and there is something to compare. I will not describe all the hard work in the sky, but my romantic inspiration evaporated literally in the first internship flights. I felt like something between Cinderella and the workhorse (all with the prefix "poor" and "poor").

And then a happy chance brought my forever sdelannoe from stress and lack of sleep body in business aviation. Finally I felt myself the one who wanted to be since childhood - the Queen of heaven! Finally, my children's ideas about the profession of flight attendants are fully embodied in reality.

I apologize for the silly picture, but that's how I imagined myself and my future)))

Yes, the fairy tale began: business trips throughout Europe, America, marvelous Asia, the Paradise Islands (as you know, on private planes to Egypt and Turkey do not fly); luxury hotels (pilots of private aircraft often foreigners and the European labor code took care of them – the crew should not live in hotels below 4 stars, as flights are often spontaneous, in the season there are not even 4-star and we are often settled in Pyaterochka-there are always places). And of course a good...very good salary.

Long thought about what to write about: about the specifics of the work or passengers-stopped at the last, although business aviation is curious in all aspects.

I will introduce you to some nuances:

Nuance № 1-Civil aviation is divided into regular (which fly 98% of people) and business (2% elected with their loved Corgi)))

Believe me, the flight with some banker or Minister is much easier than two hundred passengers economy class. And it's not in the status, just rich people usually sleep the whole flight, and each of the two hundred passengers economy class requires special attention, resents that the chicken is over and there is only meat, or freaks out that there is Coca-cola, and he prefers Pepsi.

- Please, juice: Apple, orange, tomato.

- Any pears?

- Please: meat, fish, chicken.

- A fish white or red?

- White. (anticipating the next question) Telapia.

- Tilapia? Is this fish marine or freshwater?

A similar situation, if any oligarch takes employees, and even worse – journalists. The oligarch, with a lion calm enjoy life and want the rest of the wine in 1974 (although they were never offered) and black caviar, with contempt poke with a fork in the black sea bass and insulted push a Cup of tea...how do you not have white tea???

As a regular flight attendant we were constantly sent to courses to improve service on Board. "Make sure that in the business class the salt shaker with the airline logo has always been turned to the passenger." If there is information that flies some high officials all stood on the ears, in business class were placed experienced stewardess (much older than the inexperienced, to the chagrin of passengers male))). In business aviation the VIPs and officials of the first rank is no surprise. My phone was ringing off the hook "is everything okay?"are the passengers happy?", "call me when you sit" in only one case, when the Board came a modest form of inconspicuous men together with their wives (more like a parishioner from the Church)...you'll never guess who it is!...members of former organized crime (organized criminal groups). They like to fly to Holy places-to the island of Athos or there to Jerusalem. Flight news read books in old Russian. Once the child is 12 years were asked to include the movie "Gentlemen of fortune". Just in case, I checked with the head of the family. "What do you mean? By no means. They're kids!»

It should be noted that almost all of the clients, especially the owners, keep the kids in line. Flew a large company with the children, and the son of the owner of the plane told the other children that it was "his" plane, the Pope immediately sent a bouncer in stuff, where he slept until morning on the floor. Remember the youths of the North-Caucasian appearance – behaved arrogantly and unleashed, while their fathers sat in a different cabin. But this is an isolated case.

Caveat No. 2: there are passengers is Commerce, and there are owners of the aircraft are gods.

The owners of the aircraft can be easily calculated – open the Forbes magazine, they are all there. But a few of them can afford the luxury of not renting out their Board. The contents of the plane on the ground a hundred times more expensive than the sky. Hundreds of thousands of dollars per month (the average Parking Aeroflot flight was no more than 1.5 hours – it takes you to the cleaners and technicians, to prepare the salon and start a new batch of passengers). Therefore, there are special companies that serve private jets and rent them out. The only rule is the desire of the owner in priority and if he needs to fly urgently, the task of the Manager to provide the owner of his plane on demand. At a time when I flew (and it wasn't that long ago), in Moscow, there were only 2 people who do not rent their aircraft. One of them had as many as two planes and a private hangar...now this man is wanted by Interpol. Guess what? Correct! For fraud in especially large sizes. And once it was called a personal wallet of the...Yes, other things no matter whose wallet it was.

Nuances №3-flight attendants in business aviation are also divided into two types: who works with the owner and Commerce. I preferred to work only with Commerce. A personal flight attendant is not even a personal assistant – she knows that the owner drinks only pink champagne, she checks whether there are several sticks of doctor's sausage, sunflower seeds and kvass on Board – this set should be present anywhere in the world, and grief to all if something is not! She rushes around London choosing a pajama for the owner, makes tax free on the purchase of his wife, includes a disc with a certain melody (the owner wants that he was met on Board the sounds of the Spanish guitar). No matter whether you're on vacation, sitting there in the theater or with your loved ones in the country – comes SMS that 2 hours flight and you are rushing...when the return is not known. Perhaps you are drawn paintings adultery. To my young MCH-100%

Nothing like that! I didn't know of any case that the owner was in a serious relationship with a stewardess (theoretically everything is possible, but I'm talking about the relationship, not the affair). But I know a case where the owner paid five million rubles, and saved his girl from cancer.

With Commerce everything is simpler, less responsibility, and the salary is the same. But who are these people willing to unfasten a hundred and sixty thousand dollars for a flight to Boston? Or fifty thousand euros for Peter? There are more than you think. For example, in the crisis of 2008, the entire international business aviation survived only at the expense of Russian customers. Then European companies began to dumping the market and order a plane from Zurich to London was cheaper than from Moscow. Remember the flight Moscow-Minsk turn with the expectation of 4 hours in the hotel. The passenger-old-old grandfather with a cane (very beautiful, as have London aristocrats), dressed gracefully and costly. In my imagination immediately drew the picture: the second wave of immigrant came from America to visit the graves of their ancestors. Grandfather planted, and on the way to the hotel (one of the best we pilots had to expect) the supervisor broke all my illusions, and dropped it on the ground: no it's not an immigrant, and their regular customer. This passenger is known to all airport staff. (grandfather prefers to land at the presidential airport, it is expensive, but in fifteen minutes from the center) Remember when Russia banned the casino? Yes, grandpa several times a week flies to Minsk to play. Each trip: plane+Parking+a small change in the placement of staff = sixty thousand euros!!! For one flight!

Of course the owners are friends with our selibabi and sometimes hilarious'm flying, but this happens not very often. One day I had to go to Jurmala. That the flight will be Ksenia told me before the flight (probably on purpose, otherwise I would have referred the patient. Nothing personal, I just don't want to spoil the nerves, if possible not to spoil?) Already on Board it turned out that it is not flying. I in the first time seen, that would all passengers synchronously cachaca and smiled at, and someone even quietly, but happily whispered: "thank God." Nice flying Meladze with musicians, a lady came and asked me to transplant the musicians in the staff. (place in a private room, the kitchen, where he usually piled stuff and rest of flight attendants) There, to nice, as I was flying another singer, our King of pop. Flew with his group, not in staff, but as the true king. The entire flight on plasmas spun it clips around were happy and admired, especially the young man on his lap.

Probably you are interested in the subject of mistresses and automatically portrayed: private jet, leather, wood, champagne and glamorous kitties. Never in my career, I have not seen any silicone kitties. Never. Characteristic feature of all mistresses, wives, girlfriends – naturalness. Once the Deputy flew to Kiev with girls. They were all unearthly beauty, something from Sophie Lauren. No doubt the ladies were redrawn, but it is so tastefully and efficiently. Excrement. Then he each (their was two) handed boxes, by the Tiffani. I often remember this flight when I see it on TV – he is an ardent fighter against corruption and holds a high post.

And finally I will tell a story that I tell all my girlfriends, as proof that if a peasant needs, then he needs it and he will crumble into a pellet for the sake of his beloved woman:

The top Manager of a large state-owned company opened a permanent mistress, eighteen-year-old Spaniard. She often flew his plane, but we never crossed paths. The flight attendants were dissatisfied with the curves-the girl does not know a word of English and it is impossible to ask her even what she will eat. But he does not feel the soul in it, gave a mansion in Spain, carries all her relatives and even the Embassy around the world. I thought maybe he knew Spanish ... already did! Prior to that, with them often flying a translator (when it came to the interiors of the house, the three of them watched the catalogs, decide how to arrange the nest). In the end, the top (he was 45 then), I learned Spanish and is now fluent without an interpreter. My fantasy played out again: I imagined a sultry Spaniard with olive skin and all the relevant characteristics, from which men would immediately lose their heads...and finally I saw her. (we took her and the Ambassador on a tour to Bukhara). I don't even know how to describe it: a kid with braces, glasses with thick frames, normal caret with bangs, pale skin, standard shape...a very very bad option Sophie Marceau in the film "Student" or an improved version of Ugly Betty.

And a week before that, I took a rest on Baikal children and Top's wife, pretty blonde…

Stories darkness, just to say not pererastaet...business aviation is a special world!

Thank you for your attention!

View full: http://www.spletnik.ru/blogs/konkursy_i_oprosy/133463_kak-ya-rabotala-styuardessoy-biznes-aviatcii


Date: 9 April 2018 - 13:25
Themes business aviation, private jet, queen of heaven, stewardess

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